SIan XIAN!! XD

Tuesday, February 9, 2010

everything that happened, everything that i thought i've gotten over, everything that i thought i had put all the way at the back of the memories... it all came rushing back right at me. i don't know why. i was just returning to school from HQ after freestyle drill comp. briefing. at HQ, when i first arrived at the auditorium...i thought i was late..but i wasn't...and there was another thing that i noticed..i was the only who went there alone to represent my team...other schs had at least 2 ppl.... and while walking back... there was a group of ppl walking in front of me..and they seemed to have so much fun. and..well....i just suddenly felt very lonely... then what happened between me and her during the first few month of sec 1 just came flying back to me. i never wanted to remember what happened. but i just came back. it got me thinking about everything. about the time i spent getting over her..the time i wasted beofre talking in class again.... about all the friends i made after i lost her.. all the good times i had.......about how it can all end that easily... in a second. at the time you'll never expect. i dont know why! i dont. i dont. i just started thinking "what will i do if all the grest friends i made after her were to all disappear one by one? what will happen to my life if there weren't any friends in my life? how am i going to live without friends? can i survive living so lonely? with noone to talk to?" i dont know why. but these were the questions and the images of these great friends that keep poping out in my head til i reached back school.
and when i thought i wasn't going to cry...my eyes started to get watery when i stood outside the room where the others are practicing the freestyle.. i could here them laughin inside. i don't want to lose them...and i just stood there for a while....till my wet eyes becomes drier a bit. and entered...they were there...all of them...and those who weren't their faces just came to mind. i had to bit my lips as i brief them on the different criterias for the competition. i tried to cheer up by looking at him...but i just got more afraid in losing them all. and when we finally got dismissed...i couldn't talk. cause i know...if i were to say something...tears will just fall. my mum called me right after i stepped out of school. she asked me to go back earlier. such coincidence...i couldn't have hold myself back for so long too...
went off for home. i didn't want anyone to see tears drop down my face...so i held back til i reached home. the next thing i knew. i sat on my bed.. and tears came falling down........

feiyun said that friendships do break. some ppl are meant to stay by you. some aren't. some are just passer-by. true friends will stay by you no matter what. so you don't need to think too much about them leaving. cause they won't.
i'll never ever want to lose them, my memories, the times we had. never ever...... (due to my lack of photos...i only have these...paisei)